6. When The Going Gets Tough, The Hero Gets Going

JO here...

For the curious folk, this story used to be rated M but I changed it to T since nothing too M will be occurring any time soon. The sequel however is a definite M for various themes, of which I'll label for your convenience later.

If you'd like to see pictures of what Hero looks like, I have links/directions on how you can view any and all TTLG fanarts that myself or other wonderful artists have drawn.

EDITED 06/27/23

Disclaimer: I do not own Kuroshitsuji.

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6. When The Going Gets Tough, The Hero Gets Going

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An impressive and elegant horse drawn Phantomhive carriage rolled through the bustling streets of London around early morning the next day. Through the pristine glass window, I peered outside the carriage, excitement coursing through me like a kid locked in a toy store. And how could I not be?

We were finally doing it. The Jack the Ripper arc!

I felt my hands tingling at the thought of starting the infamous case. After weeks of inactivity, I can finally show off the detective skills that I've spent years honing. So what if I already knew who the culprit was? It's how you reach the conclusion that matters.

To me, this whole scenario was like the movie From Hell where my man Johnny Depp played Inspector Alberlin. I blinked. Oh my gosh. I'm going to meet Inspector Alberlin! The realization had me grinning like a loon and bouncing in my seat. Across from me, Ciel stared at me as if I were crazy. If only he knew!

"Why are so energetic?" he asked.

"Do I look too energetic? My bad! Probably just the London atmosphere that has me feeling this way," I told him, trying to sit as demurely as I could possibly fake it.

Oh my gosh, I cannot wait!

"Right," he said.

The seriousness in his gaze as he stared at the letter in his hand dampened my mood a little as I remembered what exactly this arc entailed. And I'm not talking about Ciel in a dress, which I seriously cannot wait. For a while now, I've been wondering about something very crucial and that's if I can somehow prevent Madame Red from dying.

To be honest, I always felt she was a great character and I had been really upset when Grell killed her off. I stayed silent for quite some time, contemplating this matter with the seriousness it deserved. I didn't notice the carriage stop or when Sebastian opened the door.

"Miss Hero?" he said, waiting for my hand.

I looked up suddenly as the idea hit me.

"That's it! That's what I'll do!" I exclaimed, beaming.

"Do what?" Ciel asked.

I gave Sebastian my hand as he helped me down from the carriage. "Oh, never you mind smallest Ciel! Never you mind."

"Maybe the London atmosphere has affected you," Ciel murmured as he stood beside me in front of his London Townhouse.

As we did, I had to admit, the place looked pretty swanky if you liked antique Victorian décor with its dark pastels and patterned wallpaper. Even after knowing how rich Ciel was, it always surprised me when I witness first hand just how expensive looking some of the stuff he owned was. I resisted touching anything. I didn't want to have to owe the kid anything, especially when I literally had nothing to my name here.

"I hate this," Ciel complained as Sebastian opened the wooden front door for us. "There are too many people in London."

"I kind of like it. A little liveliness is good for the soul," I told him, looking around.

Sebastian smiled at my choice of words. "There is no helping it, my lord. It's tradition for the nobility to migrate to Town en masse every Season."

"The Season, eh? A waste of time if you ask me."

"Now don't be such a spoil sport! To each his own after all," I said to Ciel with a smile.

"And getting away from the manor will also prove to be a nice change of pace. It's a break from those four at least," Sebastian added, referring to the missing Mey-Rin, Bard, Finny, and Tanaka. "We can enjoy a little peace and quiet for a time."

I didn't think it was too bad having Tanaka around. I thought he was pretty chill, not to mention his character was pretty cool; especially during the Murder Mystery Arc. Now the trio, whoa boy, they were definitely a handful, but they meant well. Still, Sebastian had a point.

"Some peace and quiet does sound nice," agreed Ciel as he and I stopped before the set of double doors leading to the parlor room.

As Sebastian went to open them, I realized too late that we most certainly wouldn't be getting any peace and quiet any time soon. But what was the point in telling them about that now? Especially when their reactions in a few seconds would be too hilarious to pass up.

When the doors opened to reveal Madame Red shamelessly going through the bookshelves in the room with Grell assisting her and Lau randomly looking inside an empty pot, I grinned, turning my face away before Ciel saw me.

"For goodness's sake! Where do they keep the tea in this house?" Madame Red muttered in frustration.

"I can't find it either," Lau commented. My shoulders shook as I struggled to stifle my laughter, having just witnessed Ciel and Sebastian's shocked reactions to the uninvited guests.

"Don't be silly! Of course, it's not in there!" Madame Red exclaimed as she chided Lau.

Finally, Ciel spoke up, giving me a side glance as if to say "why didn't you warn me?". I gave him an innocent smile which he sighed to.

"Madame Red? Lau? What are you doing here?"

Madame Red glanced at us as Lau stood up, having finally noticed the new occupants in the room. "Oh Ciel! You're rather early, dear. And hello to you, Miss Hero. It's nice to see you again."

I waved. "Sup. Great to see you too."

Lau faced us as he got rid of the pot from his hands. "Your sudden appearance in Town must mean..."

"...The Queen's Guard Dog has a new scent to follow," Madame Red finished with a seductive smirk.

Ciel did not look amused. A few minutes later found us all seated in the dining room, sipping tea like the Brits some of us weren't (such as Lau and I) as Ciel explained the mission.

"He's struck again. Another prostitute was gruesomely murdered in Whitechapel. These killings are far from normal. The level of violence seen is most unprecedented," Ciel told them. "The most recent victim was a woman named Mary Ann Nichols. It appeared a special type of blade was used on her. She was torn up beyond recognition."

I frowned, eyeing Grell briefly before I resumed eating my slice of pie Sebastian had served us all a few minutes ago. I swear Grell wouldn't be so bad if he'd toned down on the theatrics and actually felt the emotion called compassion every once in a while. But then, who was I to judge?

Ciel continued. "The murderer's unique style of killing has earned him a nickname from the press—"

"Jack the Ripper, got it." I interrupted absently. I tried capturing the stray raisin on my plate. "I admit the name is a lot better than the Leather Apron, which is what the press wanted to call the perp, but honestly? It just wouldn't have caught on." I looked up and found everyone staring at me. "What? You know it's true."

"Indeed. It certainly is a frightening name," Lau commented, probably humoring me.

"That's why I'm here earlier than expected. I hurried into town to look at the situation for myself," Ciel finished.

Lau placed his tea cup down, a mischievous smile on his lips as he stood up. "But are you sure you'll be brave enough to stomach the crime scene?"

Ciel frowned. "What do you mean by that?"

"The sight of the dismembered body will certainly be horrific. And one can only imagine the stench. Blood and gore everywhere, surely it would be enough to drive some men mad. Are you prepared to see such a thing?" Lau stopped walking behind my chair and patted my head as he smiled at Ciel.

"Lau's right," I added seriously. "I researched Jack the Ripper for my project in class once and those crime scenes were more bloody and gory than a cheesy B-rated horror movie. My friend Amanda couldn't stand it."

"Movie?" Madame Red echoed in confusion.

"Film," I amended. "American thing. Don't mind me."

"Very true," Lau agreed, purposely leaning in close to me. "After all, you're just a boy my lord."

Ciel dead serious eye looked like he was about to stab Lau with his dessert fork if he didn't step away from us. "I am the Head of the Phantomhive and in service to my Queen. Don't ask foolish questions. And get off my pawn."

Sebastian eyed Lau with a look that said he'd help Ciel in disposing the man if he didn't comply. Seriously, what's with all this tension? Lau was just kidding around.

Lau looked like he got the hint and backed away a little. "You're right. So sorry."

Madame Red calmly sipped her tea. I stared at her briefly before my gaze shifted to Grell. He caught my look and smiled. I looked at my empty plate.

I know for a fact that a one-on-one chat wouldn't work on Grell. I wasn't sure how to convince the reaper to stop the senseless killing. So what was I supposed to do about him? He wasn't like Madame Red, who cared for Ciel more then she let on. It wouldn't take much to convince her to quit (given I said the right words). I tapped my chin in thought.

What to do, what to do...

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We ended up going to the crime scene first.

I admit I was feeling like this was all surreal. I still couldn't believe we were actually going to one of Jack the Ripper's murder victim's crime scene! I wonder what new evidence and wonders I'll uncover. With my futuristic way of thinking I was bound to catch some clues the police had missed. Not to brag or anything but I mean, come on! Technology and the way of approaching crime had evolved over the years after all.

I clutched the strap of my knapsack (my trusty sidekick that's an absolute must for a Detective Extraordinaire such as myself) and followed Ciel and Sebastian as we approached the place. It was surrounded by a crowd of curious onlookers and policemen as they warded everyone out.

Inspector Alberline (omfg, it's him in the flesh and he looks pretty damn cute!) looked up from the reports he held in his hand and smiled apologetically at Ciel as the boy approached the scene. "Sorry my boy," he said. "I'm afraid the crime scene is no place for a child. Now why don't you run along home?"

"I'm here to see the victim's body," Ciel announced smoothly, much to Alberline's shock. I stood behind Ciel, trying to glance past him into the crime scene. It was a mystery waiting, just calling for me! I suppressed the urge to just barge in like I normally do. That may have flown in Miami thanks to Phil but such an action would not be welcomed here.

"The body? Surely you're kidding me—"

"Alberline!" called a familiar strict voice. I knew it was Sir Randall before he even stepped into the light. He spotted Ciel and sneered. "Well, if it isn't Lord Phantomhive. What are you doing here?"

Alberline turned to him. "You know this kid, sir?"

"I'm here to help, Sir Randall, since it seems your investigation is lagging behind. You know who sent me here of course," Ciel smugly showed him the Queen's letter. Sir Randall clenched his teeth. I looked past him and sighed. Can we please move this along? Louie, my magnifying glass, was calling me to use him!

Ciel snatched the papers out of Alberline's hands and scanned them quickly. "It seems you haven't found any major clues yet."

Sir Randall snatched the papers back. "We at Scotland Yard are more than capable of handling this case I assure you. There's no need for you to interfere."

"That may be so, but you guys are in the early stages of criminal investigation. You wouldn't know what to look for exactly," I said, fed up at having to wait. I took out my leather gloves and placed them on, garnering Sir Randall and Alberline's attention.

"Um, sir, who is she?" asked Alberline.

Sir Randall frowned. "Using your 'weapon' eh, Phantomhive?"

Ciel merely smiled. "I need to be sure that you haven't missed anything important."

"I told you my talents lay elsewhere, Sir Randall. I'm Hero Sanders, Detective Extraordinaire, and don't you forget it," I said, walking forward as I took out my Sherlock Holmes hat and placed it on. Butterflies fluttered in my stomach.

I heard Alberline utter a protest before I tuned him out and went right to work. I took Louie out and walked over where the murder took place. A few of the policemen eyed me in confusion, as did the crowd. I slowly looked around at the obvious; dirt, dried blood, more dirt and more dried blood. Some of the evidence had been tampered with from where people had unknowingly stepped on it. I glanced at one particular policeman who was stepping on some dried blood. I rolled my eyes before continuing.

I found small traces of brown hair, nearly invisible against the dark ground. "Hello now?"

I bent down and laid Louie closer for further inspection. Not animal fur, too thin and even though it was muddled, too glossy. I used Louie's smaller eye and confirmed my suspicions. It was human hair. I looked over at Alberlin who was standing a few feet away from me.

"What color was the victim's hair?"

He looked surprised before answering. "She had brown hair."

I looked at his hair, making him feel a little uncomfortable.

"You have auburn hair," I pointed out. I looked over at the other policemen. "Blond, dirty blond, black, grey. Was there anyone else who came by the crime scene?"

"Uh, the slaughters and Dr. Henry Llewellyn. Plus a few more people."

I tsked. "You need to make sure your crime scene doesn't have just any one running around through it. It could tamper with the evidence."

"I agree entirely," Sir Randall said, looking at both me and Ciel.

"Where was her body found?" I asked Alberlin. He pointed a few feet from us. I turned back to the hair. I surveyed the area carefully, scenarios running through my mind before I spotted more hair as I got farther away from where the body had once been.

"Of course," I murmured to myself. She had obviously been dragged to this place. There wasn't enough blood around if she had been truly murdered here. Wow, these guys suck if they couldn't catch that. "You guys do realize she was dragged here, right?"

"Dragged? Why would you say that?"

"Traces of hair showing more frequently as you get farther away from the crime scene, lack of blood around, the fact that this place is way too open to the public making it easy to interrupt what looked like a serious blood bath. Common sense, sweetie. Use your brain," I told him as I left the crime scene even further before my eyes spotted a damning piece of evidence on the ground. Snap!

How could anyone have missed that? I mean seriously. I carefully glanced at Alberline who was writing down what I had previously mentioned and the other policemen who were chatting amongst themselves. Sir Randall was glaring at Ciel who merely smirked at him. Sebastian just eyed me, waiting to see what I would do next.

I bent down again and inconspicuously took a snagged piece of hair from between some cobblestones. In between the dark color, snatches of red were showing, as if the dark brownish black color was slowly fading away. I took out my handkerchief and pretended to sneeze, carefully placing the evidence inside and tucking it away. The world wasn't ready for the truth just yet.

"Bless you," Alberline said as he looked up from his notes.

I smiled brightly as I got up, taking off my gloves and stowing Louie away into my knapsack, along with my handkerchief. "Why thank you! What a day it must have been, huh, Inspector Alberline!"

He smiled. "Sure was. Very busy and a little frustrating if you ask me."

"I'm sure it was. Would you be so kind as to escort me back?" I asked, trying to look all girly and innocent. I wonder if it was working. It must have because Alberline blushed before he agreed. I took his arm and we walked back to the awaiting trio over by the crowd.

"Be sure to take my advice and really open your eyes. Think outside the box, it'll do you a world of good. And be on the lookout for another murder, I have a feeling Old Jacky will want to display another piece of artwork soon," I told him seriously. Alberline nodded.

"If you don't mind me asking, how come you seem to know so much?"

I chuckled. "Experience. I've solved quite a number of cases myself back in Miami. That's in America by the way."

"America? Really?" he asked, impressed.

I gave him my dazzling smile. "It's in the Sanders blood. My father is a detective as well and quite a good one. Oh look, we're here!"

As we approached, I noticed Ciel scowling at Alberline. Sebastian was also giving him a frown. Can they (namely Ciel) just smile for once? "Well that was informative," I said, letting go of Alberline's arm. I curtseyed before thanking and bidding him fare-well. Ciel took that opportunity to grab my hand and walk me away from everyone.

"Well, Sir Randall. We'd best be on our way," he told the man who merely humphed. With that we left, leaving an awed Alberline and an annoyed Sir Randall behind. Ciel was silent for a few minutes (he was still holding my hand) before he glanced at me.

"What?" I asked.

"Didn't I tell you not to flaunt yourself? That you'd catch unwanted attention?"

"From Alberline?" I said in disbelief. Ciel nodded, blushing too. I started chuckling. "You can't be serious."

"One can never be too careful," added Sebastian, smiling politely. It was that smile that had me worried. Now I'm scared to go near the inspector for fear something will happen to him.

"Right, okay. I'll try not to 'flaunt' myself next time," I said, just to humor them.

"Remember Hero, you're my pawn. Now, what did you find?" Ciel asked as we got close to our waiting group of Lau, Grell, and Madame Red. I smiled cheerfully at them all.

"Nothing important. I just found the usual. Blood, dirt, hair. Lots of hair. My, don't people shed hair like crazy!" I said jokingly, elbowing Grell in the ribs. "Right, Grell?"

"Huh? Oh, uh, yes, I suppose."

"So you found nothing?" Ciel asked in disbelief.

"Which already gives us a clue, silly," I told him, playfully flicking his forehead. "The murderer is being careful not to be discovered, as is the case with most murderers, but this victim was obviously dumped here. He or she would be very concerned if anything were to be linked back to them, I mean, him or her.

"So already we can infer that the victim was dragged here from the actual place she got murdered in. Now a regular, low-class person wouldn't care too much about getting caught seeing as they don't have much to lose. The victim herself was poor, there wouldn't be much to steal from in the first place either. And most of the residents here are poor and also wouldn't give much. If a regular person were caught and thrown in jail, they'd be clothed and fed there. I read about the prisons around this time once and apparently, they're like a bump closer to heaven then the actual streets.

"But," I added, "if the murderer were, say someone well-known, or important or had money and status, why then they'd have everything to lose if they were caught. Also, her body was dumped in a rather public place which is odd because normally killers want to hide the evidence so they can continue killing. So unless this killer was not so bright, which I doubt, the killer actually enjoys murdering these women and bathing them in red."

They all blinked. I smiled.

"So what we have on our hands, everyone, is a sadistic killer with a penchant for the dramatic flair while at the same time having a position in society that cannot be risked if he or she were to get caught." I didn't mention that the two components could be attributed to two separate people.

"Wow. That's brilliant logic," Madame Red commented in awe.

"Please, you flatter me. It's simple deduction," I told her.

"Well, at least there's that. Then it must be from someone in the upper class," Ciel stated as the carriage appeared before them. "But there's still not enough clues. The Yard on the other hand has nothing and Sir Randall was being impractical. I suppose we should go see someone who will be of use to us."

Lau gaped. "My lord, you don't mean…?"

Ciel looked like he was going to be sick. "Yes, indeed."

I clapped my hands and smiled. "This is ought to be fun!"

We all stood in front of the Undertaker's place of business in some obscure, dingy part of London. I felt myself light up like a Christmas tree at just being here.

I was serious when I had told Amanda that I liked the Undertaker like the kick ass uncle I never had. He actually had a sense of humor that most coroners I met didn't-plus he was kind of hot underneath all that hair. Unlike said coroners and funeral directors, he wouldn't be bothered if I was trying to uncover clues and information from his deceased clients. I couldn't wait to meet him!

"So, where are we?" Lau asked us at last.

Madame Red snapped. "You mean you don't know? Then what was all that about?"

"It's a funeral parlor run by an acquaintance of my lord's," Sebastian explained patiently, noticing how excited I was.

Madame Red looked up. "The Undertaker, huh?"

I followed Sebastian and Ciel as we went inside. It was a darkly lit, cramped place made of dark wood and darker wallpaper filled with coffins and saturated by dust. It smelled of mildew and formaldehyde, causing me to wrinkle my nose. I suppose this place was better in theory.

Ciel looked around. "We're looking for answers so this is the place."

An eerie chuckle reverberated throughout the room.

"Welcome, I thought I'd be seeing you before long," said a creepy voice. Madame Red, Lau and Grell freaked when a coffin started to open up behind them. Grell collapsed in fright and they all gaped as the Undertaker revealed himself. "My lord, it's so lovely to see you. Do I finally have the pleasure of fitting you for one of me coffins today?"

He was a tall man with thick long silver hair wearing the most wrinkled suffocating black robe with dangling odds and ends I have ever seen. I couldn't help it. I shrieked in joy as I hugged the former grim reaper. Everyone else looked on in astonishment at my bravery. Even the Undertaker was momentarily stunned before cackling once more.

"Wow, just as epic in the flesh!" I gushed.

The Undertaker looked at me with a curious smile. "And who might you be?"

I stepped back and bowed low with a flourish. "Hero Sanders, Detective Extraordinaire!"

Undertaker tilted his head in thought. He leaned in close and examined me with a critical eye. I smiled.

"Well if this isn't a surprise," he said, voice low. "I never thought I'd see another one alive in my lifetime."

I blinked. "One what? An American?"

He laughed again. When he finished, he looked at Sebastian before bursting into raucous laughter once more. "And you've no clue, eh dearie? Hee, hee! This is entertaining, isn't it, butler?"

Sebastian stiffened but said nothing, not giving an ounce of his thoughts away. I scratched my head in confusion before shrugging. The Undertaker was a little weird, after all.

"Anyways, it's nice to meet you Undertaker. I've heard so much about you!"

"Really now? Does this mean you want to be fitted for one of me coffins?"

I looked thoughtfully at the stacked coffins. "Well I haven't really thought that far, but you're right. It's always good to be prepared. You never know when you might actually need it."

Madame Red looked stunned. "You're actually agreeing with him?"

I grinned. "As Detective Extraordinaire I have to be prepared for anything." I turned towards the Undertaker.

"My coffin has to be pink and a rich brown with a symbol of a magnifying glass on it. And I was thinking the wood should be redwood, since I always liked those kinds of trees. Oh wait, has anyone even discovered them yet? Well, putting that aside, my headstone has to have 'Detective Extraordinaire' and 'Hammertime Queen' written on it," I explained to him seriously.

Undertaker nodded, waiting for more as he wrote it all down on a small notepad. I felt Ciel grab my hand and tug me away.

"What are you doing? We're not here for that," he hissed.

I rolled my eyes. "Fine. We'll do this your way."

Undertaker chuckled. "I like this girl. Quite an imagination."

Ciel coughed, looking annoyed. "Yes well, we're not here for coffins. I wanted to—"

Undertaker placed a finger against Ciel's lips. "No need to say," he said, retreating. "I'm already aware. Very well aware. One of my recent clients was a bit unusual shall we say? I helped though. I made her look beautiful again."

"I would like the details please."

"Then let's have a chat. I'll make some tea or something. Won't you just take a seat over there?"

They all looked confused and I giggled. "On the coffins people. Where else?"

Once we all took a seat, I checked to make sure the one Ciel and I had chosen was empty of any "clients", the Undertaker began.

"Now then. You want to hear about Jack the Ripper, yes? The Yard is starting to get their knickers in a bunch about it now, but this isn't the first time I've had a client like that."

Everyone looked at the beaker full of tea in their hands in question. I swirled the contents in mine and wondered if he had sugar or milk. Madame Red looked up in confusion at the Undertaker's words.

"Not the first time? What do you mean?"

"In the past there have been a number of cases involving murdered whores," the Undertaker informed them, chomping on a dog boned shaped biscuit. I always wondered what those tasted like. He swallowed and offered one to Ciel who responded with an "I'll pass". He offered one to me and I curiously took it, munching on the end, much to Ciel's stunned surprise.

"What?" I said to him. "It's actually good. It's kind of like a graham cracker."

He shook his head in defeat. The Undertaker chuckled at our little exchange and continued. "But their intensity and cruelty continues to escalate," he said. "The yard failed to take notice because the murders weren't terribly bloody at the outset, but all the prostitutes killed in Whitechapel had something in common."

"Something in common?" Ciel echoed.

"Whatever could it be? Well wouldn't you like to know?" he teased.

Ciel inwardly groaned. Now, I could just tell Ciel what it was the prostitutes were missing, but then I'd missed out on all this fun. And really, why spoil it now? I remained silent through the exchange.

Lau spoke up. "Oh, I get it. The funeral parlor is only your cover business. How much is it for information?"

Undertaker's eye gleamed before he rushed toward the startled Lau. "I have no need for the Queen's coin. There's only one thing I want from you." Lau looked like he was about to faint when the Undertaker turned his head to look at Ciel. He rushed over and pleaded. "Please my lord. Give it to me and I'll tell you anything."

Ciel looked like he swallowed a bug. I giggled.

"Give me the extraordinary gift of true laughter," the Undertaker declared, a string of drool on one side of his mouth. "Just one joke and all me information is yours!" He looked rather desperate for it. I smiled as Ciel muttered "lunatic" under his breath.

"My lord, please allow me to handle this," Lau announced bravely as he moved forward. "People have called me the sleeping tiger of New Year's parties in Shanghai. And now I shall demonstrate that in full, ready?…a fool…on a futon!"

No one laughed. I face palmed. That was an epic fail on so many levels.

Madame Red stepped up to the plate. "You'll never do Lau. Madame Red," she announced with a flourish. "The star of social circles will share with you her best tale!" Uh-oh.

"Sebastian cover Ciel's ears!" I told him quickly.

"What?" Ciel echoed before Sebastian blocked his ears just as Madame Red began.

"So then xxx was xxx. And his xxx was xxx too!" She laughed at her own joke. "And the *bleep* with the *bleep*. *bleep* *bleep* *bleep* and *bleep*."

I blinked. Wow. I didn't know Victorian upper-class ladies could be so crass. It felt like my ears were being raped. And here I thought they were saintly. I was glad Sebastian had covered Ciel's ears. What seemed like an hour later, the rejected Lau and the equally rejected fuming Madame Red had a red x slapped over their mouths. The Undertaker then looked at me.

I laughed nervously. "Uh, sorry to disappoint, but I'm not really funny. When I try to be, I suck. Ask Ciel."

Said boy stiffened as if he was about to be injected with arsenic. The Undertaker looked at Ciel with a creepy smile. "That leaves only you, my lord. The last time I was a bit generous if I do say so myself, but no specials this time."

Ciel scowled. "Damn." I glanced at Sebastian who looked at me in question. I smiled innocently and he sighed before stepping forward. Ciel looked up, surprised. "Sebastian?"

"It appears there's no helping it, my lord," he proclaimed.

"Oh? Master Butler is having a go now is he?"

"Everyone, please step outside if you would," he turned to give us the death look. "No matter what, you must not, under any condition, peek inside."

Message received loud and clear. We all stood outside the Undertaker's place, waiting with bated breath. It was quiet for a few minutes and I took this opportunity to randomly glomp Ciel again.

"Hey!"

"You were caught off guard. I couldn't help it," I replied with a smile, snuggling my cheek against Ciel's blushing one.

"Well, aren't you two friendly," Madame Red teased.

I lifted my head and poked his cheek. "He's just so darn cute! It should be considered criminal."

"Well, the Earl is still a child after all," said Lau.

Ciel scowled at him before grabbing the back of my neck and bringing our faces closer together. He smirked at Lau. "And yet as a 'child' I still receive and enjoy the benefits."

Wait. What?

Madame Red and I were stunned while Lau looked like he'd been bested (and by a twelve year old no less). I didn't even have a chance to respond at the oddness of Ciel's behavior when at that moment the Undertaker's place of business started to shake. He let loose a belly laugh that could be heard from a mile away. We all sweat dropped. The door slowly creaked open, revealing a smiling Sebastian.

"Please come in," he said. "He has agreed to speak to us." Behind him sat a slightly twitching Undertaker who continued to laugh every few seconds.

He looked up, drool on the side of his mouth. "Well, to get to the matter at hand, heh heh, I'll tell you anything you wish to know."

"What did you do?" Ciel asked Sebastian.

"Nothing much," came the reply. I grinned to myself. And I wanted to miss this? Puh-lease!

"For a while now," started the Undertaker. "I've occasionally had clients who are missing, how shall I say? Lacking, you see?"

"Lacking?" Sebastian repeated in thought.

"Yes, quite lacking. Their innards that is," said the Undertaker as he hugged an anatomical doll like the one in my science class. Apparently these kiddies have never seen one before judging by their expressions. "Before my clients can rest easy on their beds, I must get them nice and clean, yes? Like pushing in whatever might have spilled out. And examining them as I do my duty. It's a little hobby of mine, you see?"

Lau, Madam Red, and Grell paled and pushed their beakers away.

"So they were all lacking a kidney or some such? In that case the killer is a loan shark or the like," Lau said, holding his sleeved hand over his mouth.

"Chinese cellar rats think up the most disturbing things! That's not what I meant," admonished the Undertaker with a chuckle. Lau frowned in annoyance. "It is something only a prostitute, a girl would possess."

How can it not be obvious?

"Each was missing a uterus."

Ciel looked alarmed.

"There went the baby making machine," I said. I innocently smiled at the woman in red. "Right, Madame Red?"

She smiled weakly and nodded.

"Lately I've been seeing a rise in such clientele all of a sudden. And their crimson 'rouge' is becoming gaudier by the day. It's all keeping me very busy."

I shook my head. "Goodness, it's as if the killer enjoys bathing the victims in red. He might have a fetish. Right Grell?" I asked with a naïve giggle.

Grell paled, sweating as he reluctantly nodded.

"Even with few people," Sebastian began, "by committing murder on the street, moreover in the dead of night, would it not be difficult for an amateur to cut out the womb with the necessary precision?"

"Quite the bright candle, aren't we, Master Butler? I have considered that myself." As a demonstration the Undertaker approached me from behind and-wait, me? "Well let's see…first I'd take something sharp and slash the throat," he said, placing a hand over over that area. "Then I'd cut right here." He placed another hand on my womb. "And steal away the little precious."

I giggled. "The Undertaker's got a point. That means only a professional would have had the skill to do this. And to do this very quickly means they were either quite fearless or used to it, or even both."

The Undertaker cackled in agreement. He turned towards Ciel. "And that is why I knew you would come here my lord. If there were a possibility that the killer belonged to the 'Underworld' I expected you would be summoned here without fail. Heed my words, another will die."

I nodded. "He's right. They're gonna keep dying unless someone stops the killers, I mean, killer."

The Undertaker grinned, looking at Ciel. "Can you stop the killer, 'Aristocrat of Evil' Earl Phantomhive?"

Ciel stood up which was my cue to do the same. Sebastian was already placing Ciel's coat on his tiny shoulders.

"The underworld has its own rules," Ciel declared. "Its residents do not kill those on the other side without reason and they do not invade polite society using the powers of the underworld."

He took my hand and led me towards the door, Sebastian right behind us. "By our family coat of arms, I vow to eliminate, without exception, all who defile the gardens of the queen, by any means necessary." He turned his head to look back. "Excuse our intrusion, Undertaker."

In the carriage ride home, I sat in between Ciel and Sebastian, with Madame Red and Lau sitting across from us. Ciel leaned against the window.

"Based on our earlier conversation we can now simplify the list of suspects."

"Yes quite. First we have 'someone well-versed in medical science and anatomy'," listed Sebastian in thought. "Among them 'someone without an alibi on the night of the murders' and as the perpetrator has absconded with the uterus of each victim—"

"Someone involved with a secret society or cult of black magic," I finished for him.

Sebastian smiled at me with those sinful lips. "You took the words right out of my mouth, Miss Hero."

"Wait, you call this 'simplified'? Just how many people do you think gather in London during the season?" Madame Red demanded in confusion. "Not only must one consider the doctors of London but family physicians of the aristocrats from the countryside. Furthermore the medical school graduates who never became doctors and then there's Orientals like Lau who are skilled in the use of needles and are familiar with human anatomy. The season will be over in less than a week and the family physicians will return to the countryside—"

Evil smile alert! "We need only investigate before the Season ends."

"Impossible," said Lau, incredulity present in his tone.

Sebastian looked at them all with that signature smirk of his. "I should be able to do this much at least. Otherwise what kind of a butler would I be?"

I chuckled and Ciel smirked as Madame Red and Lau eye brows rose even higher. "I'll make a list of viable suspects and begin questioning them immediately my lord," Sebastian added. With that he opened the carriage door and climbed out, not at all bothered by the still moving vehicle and the dangerously scrapey cobblestones.

"Now if you'll excuse me…"

Ciel shooed him out. I waved good-bye as Sebastian disappeared over the side. Madame Red and Lau rushed to the back window.

"He knows we're moving, right?" Madame Red pointed out.

The backstreets held no signs of Sebastian.

"Sebastian will take care of it," Ciel announced as they went back to their seats. "For now we can head back home and have a cup of tea while we wait."

"I hope he remembers to get me apple juice," I murmured.

"You and your fruits," mocked Ciel.

I poked him in the cheek. "It's good for you! And don't complain. I heard you ask Sebastian for a sample once," I reminded him smugly.

Ciel blushed. "What are you talking about? I did no such thing!"

=/=/=

Madame Red, a seasoned woman of many talents, watched the exchange going on between her adorable nephew and the cheery American girl with mixed emotions. It was clear to her that they weren't even worried about Sebastian in the slightest but that wasn't the main worry stemming from her.

Their ease and comfort with each other felt and looked so natural. It felt right, even to her outsider eye. It was as though they'd been friends for years instead of weeks.

Madame Red wasn't sure whether to be amused or shocked that her nephew was developing a strong attachment—and she did mean strong—toward the exotic American chit. It was quite a sight to be hold for sure. She hadn't missed the looks he gave Alberline, the Undertaker, and Lau whenever they played too close to Miss Hero. It was cute seeing him actually care to that degree.

Except sometimes, Madame Red couldn't help but think that there was something else helping push the attraction and chemistry along. They weren't in love but there was definitely something. Maybe she was being paranoid. After all, the butler kept giving Miss Hero certain looks that a jaded woman such as herself could easily recognize. She wondered what would become of all this.

Still, she smiled to herself as the pair continued their conversation.

=/=/=

It took us a while to finally reach the Phantomhive Townhouse. Lau led the way and both adults were stunned to find an unhurried and sexy-looking butler waiting for them in the foyer.

"Welcome back everyone. I have awaited your return. The afternoon tea is in the drawing room," he said smoothly, grabbing Ciel's top hat along with my own Sherlock Holmes deerstalker—I hadn't taken it off since going to the crime scene.

"Did you get the apple juice?" I asked him.

Sebastian nodded. "Of course. It is ready for you in the drawing room along with the tea."

This kid deserved a Nobel Prize! As a reward, I reached up and quickly kissed him on the cheek. "You rock Sebastian!"

With that I followed after Ciel who had been waiting for me on the stairs. He said nothing about the kiss and merely led me to the drawing room.

Madame Red was still speechless from Sebastian's sudden appearance. "Hold on. How are you here?"

Sebastian fixed his slightly shocked features into a dazzling smile. "I had finished our little errand so I made my way home to get everything ready for you."

"You made the suspect list already?"

"Well, yes I made a list on what we've discussed and contacted them all and asked them the relevant questions."

Madame Red placed a hand on her hips. "Come now Sebastian. That's impossible. Even for you—"

And like the demon butler he was, Sebastian quickly unrolled the list and began reciting its content, shocking Madame Red further. Grell fell in love with him all over again and the already impressed Lau was even more impressed! From upstairs, Ciel smirked as I crossed my arms over my chest and smiled down at them.

"Based on these results," he concluded. "I have narrowed down the list of suspects to but one individual."

"Are you sure you're just a butler?" Madame Red questioned, exasperated.

Sebastian smiled regally. "You see, my lady, I am simply one hell of a butler."

Over tea and apple juice, we all discussed the supposed suspect: the Viscount of Druitt, Sir Alistor Chamber.

I chuckled as I thought of the man. In both the anime and manga version, the dude was hilarious comic relief and being a little hot never hurt anyone. It was revealed that he was hosting a party tonight at his place. And apparently, tonight was the only time we had a chance to investigate.

"Madame Red, this is where we stand. Can you do something about it?" Ciel asked.

Said Madame laughed. "Of course! I'll have you know that I'm quite popular and securing invitations shall be child's play!"

"Then it's decided. We'll do whatever it takes to get into that 'secret party'," declared Ciel.

I stifled my laughter by coughing. "I hope you really mean that."

"What do you mean?" he asked.

I smiled brightly as Madame Red began eyeing her nephew like a hunter about to pounce on its prey. "Oh nothing."

He sighed. "In any case, be sure not to use the Phantomhive name. We may fail to catch them otherwise. This is our only chance."

=/=/=

"This is rather grand isn't it?" commented Madame Red, decked in jewels and red lace later that night. She looked around the crowded entrance to the Druitt residence. It was a wide estate that drew heavy inspiration from old gothic architecture. Of course it was nowhere as nice as Ciel's. I much preferred the clean but intricate design of the Phantomhive Manor.

"I wonder if tonight really marks the last night of the Season," she said, lips plump and red.

"It would appear that this evening will be most delightful," Lau added, looking all spiffy in his black coat tails.

"Remember," came Ciel's voice as he emerged from the carriage, dressed in the infamous pink dress that became associated with his name during the Jack the Ripper arc. "We aren't here to mess around. We cannot let our guard down."

"I understand!" squealed Madame Red, glomping Ciel. "Oh you look so adorable in this dress!"

"Get off!" Ciel complained, his face utterly red, mortified beyond belief. "Have you picked up Hero's habit of hugging me randomly and aggressively? And why do I have to wear this?

"Hero's got the right idea, little one. And you don't like your muslin French dress?" His aunt pouted. "But it's the latest in fashion and everything."

"How could I like this?"

"Now, now," came Sebastian's too-sexy-for-my-shirt voice from behind. He was elegantly clad in a fine black coat and pressed slacks. He had on white gloves as he secured his glasses perched upon his nose, the left side of his hair pulled behind his ear. "A lady never raises her voice."

Ciel turned to look at him with a glower.

"Sebastian you bastard," he muttered darkly.

"He's right you know. You have to follow the script!" I chided him, exiting the carriage behind his back. Ciel turned and stared at me in shock. I laughed, thoroughly enjoying the situation.

I was currently dressed in a rather nice dark green coat with gold cufflinks and a crème colored ribbon tied around my neck, khaki knee-length shorts, black stockings and just below the knee dark brown laced boots. On my slicked-back hair was a rather cute top hat wrapped in a dark green ribbon, which I took off to bow towards the stunned Ciel. There were accents here and there in my outfit that were pink, the sole purpose of which was to make sure he and I were a matching set for appearances' sake.

An impressed Lau, a pleased Madame Red and an amused Sebastian observed my appearance as I twirled for them.

"How do you do, my lady?" I asked with a teasing smile.

"Why are you dressed like that?" Ciel finally asked.

"Because I look too boyish," I told him, placing the hat back on my head. "So Madame Red and Sebastian agreed that it'd be better if I went in disguised as a boy. And it's totally working! That girl and her friends over there keep winking at me."

"That's because, boy or girl, you still look just as ravishing," Lau said as he went over and placed an arm over my shoulder. "And as men we should stick together like close brothers."

If looks could hurt, Lau's limb would have been torn off savagely if Ciel's eye had any say.

"Ahem!" Madame Red interrupted. "Let's not dilly dally around, shall we? Now as the script says, Lau is my young lover."

Lau smiled, arm still over my shoulder. "Lover reporting for duty!"

"Ciel is playing as my niece from the countryside."

Ciel kept glaring at the happy go-lucky Lau.

"Sebastian is my niece's tutor."

Sebastian smiled charmingly, while the dark aura around him seemed to be finding its way towards Lau.

"Hero is my niece's fiancé from America who is also being temporarily tutored by Sebastian while she, he I mean, visits England on business."

Both Ciel and I gaped at this revelation.

"And Grell is my butler, per usual."

The poor Grell looked disappointed and crushed at his boring role. I could tell he had been hoping for something exciting and scandalous.

Lau felt his arm removed from my shoulder by a smiling Sebastian. "As a pupil of mine, I would appreciate it if you would not corrupt my lord's purity."

Lau smiled sheepishly as I giggled softly. "You guys are sure getting into your roles."

Ciel turned towards Madame Red with a furious blush. "So…why must I be Hero's fiancée?"

Madame Red laughed. "Why not? She looks so handsome as a boy that I couldn't resist! Besides, with you dressed as a girl you two look even more wonderfully adorable together!"

"That's your reason?"

Sebastian was adjusting his glasses and saying something like "these will trouble me until I get used to them". I took them off his hand and fixed it for him.

"It won't be so bad," I said. "It's only for tonight after all. Plus they make you look real sexy."

"Sexy?"

I grinned. "Just a term to say you still look handsome."

Before Sebastian could respond to that, Madame Red spoke from behind me. I turned around to see Madame Red give Ciel a final warning.

"Oh Ciel! It'd be a good joke if I were kidding but," she leaned in and whispered in his ear, "were you to be exposed as a Phantomhive, it would be disastrous for us all."

"She's right you know," I chimed in. "And it's said that the Viscount Druitt loves women of all ages. Hopefully you won't be mauled as much if he knows I'm your fiancé. Isn't that great?"

Ciel looked startled. "He what?"

"Besides, you seem to have gotten over the fact that your dressed as a girl," I pointed out cheerfully.

As the thought of him in a pink frilly dress in front of me finally sunk in, Ciel blanched in embarrassment. His little miserable face had me suspecting what I must think of him now. If only he knew I adored him even more than before!

"But don't worry!" I reassured him. "You look absolutely cute! I could never be as cute even if I tried."

Ciel didn't seem satisfied with that. Sebastian chuckled, gaining the real young lord's attention. "Were you not the one who said 'do whatever it takes'?"

"'By any means necessary?'" I added. Ciel glared at us. I grabbed his gloved hand and pulled him along. "Come on! Quit being such a spoiled sport! There's much we have to do!"

Sebastian held up a hand and led the way. "Then lets head inside, shall we, my lord and lady?" Ciel continued to glower at him but allowed himself to be pulled along.

I could tell this was going to be one of those nights.